contributed by Angela Sanders [aspiring architect / fashionista / cultural commentator]
Do-It-Yourself is one of the most loaded phrases since sack-and-save. The advent of digital cable has brainwashed audiences into believing that no home-improvement project is too impossible to tackle. 
In theory, home-improvement television programs empower the homeowner to be less dependent on contractors and more in control of their own remodeling destiny. The Promise: In thirty minutes – or maybe in a mere three weeks – you too can remodel your kitchen, landscape your property, and refinish your entire house of furniture! Ain’t it grand” Not so much. This type of TV isn’t quite Reality. They left off the part about all that it takes to get the project(s) started, making Reality more like three months or even three years…
The Background
Recently I was recruited by my DYI-loving cousin, Michelle, to help her with a granite tile countertop installation. She drafted me fresh from my summer at Harvard before my mind could recover and form a proper response, such as “NO!”
What did I learn from the experience” Something I knew already: Dust and sweat are never chic. Well, maybe there is a bit more to it, so with you – dear P&C Reader – in mind, I inquired further with the Do-It-Yourself Lady-In-Waiting. The following is our email conversation for your reading pleasure and, hopefully, education.
The Interview
When did you decide that your kitchen should be remodeled”
When I bought the house in 2001.
How long between that decision and the actual project start date and why”
Four years. I would say money is what drives most decisions. This one was no different.
Did you initially think you’d be doing the work”
No, but my skill level is improving with each project.
If not, then were you going to hire a professional, and how much money had you allotted to spend for the project”
Yes, originally I planned to hire a professional, and I approximated about $2,000.
How extensive was the project to be”
Only granite on the countertops and backsplash. The plan changed from granite only on the countertops and stone tile on the backsplash to give the area more personality.
Why didn’t you choose the granite slab”
The granite slabs were more expensive.
Where did you find out about granite tiles” (i.e. magazine, video, television show, home-improvement stores)
Home-improvement stores.
What were the tools that you were aware were necessary to take on the granite countertop project”
Wet saw, trowel, drill, screwdriver, box cutter, putty knife, tape measure, L-square, pencil, and level.
What were the tools that you weren’t aware were necessary”
Grinder. And FYI: when you make lines on the granite with a pencil to ensure straight lines, the grinder washes those right off. I improvised using a pen, but it is not recommended because granite is porous and the ink has the possibility of soaking through to the other side. Under pressure, I didn’t care, and I really doubt (hope) that does not happen. I’m told (via professional) that my pencil was not sharp enough to make a dark enough line to prevent the wash-away effect.
Do you think this project would have been easier for a man with your same knowledge level” Why”
No, he would have been just as confused. Skill level is not exclusive to gender, and, to my knowledge, there isn’t anything intuitive about the installation. The most important part is the preparation.
What made you choose your final style of granite tile” Was it your first choice”
It went with the decor of my kitchen appliances. Yes, it was my first choice.
What is your dream kitchen, and how long do you think it would take to create”
I don’t have a "dream" kitchen, but I have seen several kitchens in model homes that I could live with; however I have no intentions of trying to create them in my kitchen. The space I currently have would not allow it.
How many home-improvement shows to you view weekly”
None. I do not watch them weekly. (Only occasionally.)
Did those influence your decision to take on this granite project”
Not really. I had my own ideas and plans.
What were your expectations regarding the timeline for this project”
I thought that the preparation period would be shorter than it was. Actually, it is the preparation period that was the most time consuming part of the project.
Did you perform below or beyond your expected time of completion”
Beyond. I approximated 4 days – maybe 5. It took two weeks.
Would you take on this task again now that you possess firsthand knowledge installing granite tiles”
Yes, I can start a company now! (kidding)
Was this your first home-improvement project”
No.
What were the others”
Installing hardwood floors and crown molding, painting kitchen cabinets, adding wood trim to kitchen cabinets, and painting a house interior.
Do you prefer any one project over the others”
I enjoyed them all about the same.
Were your results as expected on the other projects”
Yes, and I receive complements on them.
Did the home-improvement television shows persuade you that you could take on these projects without being skilled in the trades you were about to experience”
No, I just felt that it was possible for a person to do it with a bit of training. The home-improvement stores offer classes for different projects.
Do you find that the home-improvement shows distort the reality of the actual project due to the time constraints imposed by a television show format”
Yes, they leave out the details that matter. For instance, the hardiback [a type of substrate] needed under the granite has to be measured out just like the granite. You have to cut it to fit perfectly. Watching those shows, they leave out just how long the project took –hours or days” It’s all very important information.
Do you continue to watch the home-improvement shows”
When I get a chance, but it isn’t a weekly thing.
What are the shows that you watch the most, as well as magazines that you purchase”
I watch HGTV and read The Family Handyman magazine and brochures from home-improvement stores.
Have you ever hired a professional, and how would you rate the difference in performance”
Yes, and I like my work better because I am not pressed to ensure that I make a profit on the job like professionals are; therefore, I can take the extra time to assess the best way to deal with an unforeseen obstacle, whereas the professional needs to make quick decisions so as to move on to the next paying customer. I have learned techniques from professionals though.
What have been your largest obstacles in home-improvement”
Not knowing what tools are needed to make the job easier.
Are you working on a project currently” If so, what kind”
Yes, Installing a pond with a waterfall in my back yard.
The Lesson
Michelle had a plan of action for installing the granite, minus the preparation time, of course. Home-improvement projects are like recipes, and adequate preparation allows you to make it through the process without catching the kitchen on fire, both literally and figuratively.
Personally, I’ve watched programs and glanced through magazines in this genre infrequently. Even so, I do not recall the preparation stage emphasized as thoroughly you would see it on a cooking show. The time allotted for the collecting of remodeling ingredients would definitely reduce the amount of time spent blazing a trail to the store daily for those small items overlooked or, more commonly, unknown.
To her great credit, the occasional setback has not quelled Michelle’s drive to take on new projects. I dream of being her someday. Okay, that’s a lie. The truth is that I did enjoy assist her for that short period of time, but have no intention of ever doing anything like it again. DIY is NFM (Not-For-Me).
